#82 - Why VDOT can stick that traffic cone where the sun doesn't shine...

After being stuck in the third traffic jam on the way home from dinner:
Me: Are you effing kidding me?!
Brian: No, I am only regular kidding you.

#81 - I think Lionel Richie was being rhetorical...

So, I am singing "I Love You" by Lionel Richie, and my husband decided to add a counter melody. It goes something like this:

Me (singing): Cause I wonder where you are...
Brian: I'm in the kitchen
Me (singing): and I wonder what you do...
Brian: I'm doing the dishes
Me (singing): are you somewhere feeling lonely...
Brian: No, the cats are in here with me
Me (singing): or is someone loving you...
Brian: I don't think they love me very much, except when I feed them

#80 - We have a clucking problem here...

When looking at a suspiciously dark paint color called "eggshell", Brian said "If that's eggshell colored, I'm not going to eat those eggs. In fact, I think I might have to kill the chicken just to be safe."

Somewhere in a suburban sith lord neighborhood far, far away...

You think that's bad? Across the street, Darth Maul is planting petunias!